Inside-Out Sausage Egg Roll

I love to cook- y'all know I do! Normally, I kinda just throw things together but sometimes you find a recipe that you love but end up tweaking it a bit for your own taste.  I found this recipe online and ended up changing it for my husband and I but it has become one of our current favorite recipes! Some of the amounts we use a bit more or less of (for taste) so feel free to do your own version! The picture below is the version without bean sprouts but we have found that the bean sprouts add even more to the mix!

This can also be eaten however you like, but this is a low carb recipe. My hubby likes his in a pita pocket!

Inside-Out Sausage Egg Roll

Prep: 5 mins   Cook Time: 15 mins

Ingredients

- 1 lb pork sausage (original)*

- 1 bag coleslaw mix**

- 1 can corn

- 1 bag of bean sprouts (optional and use fresh, not canned)

- 4 cloves garlic

- 1 tablespoon ginger (fresh or tube- not dry)

- 1 tablespoon soysauce

- 1/4 cup chopped green onions

- 1 tablespoon sesame oil

Directions

1.  Heat a large skillet over medium heat. Add the sausage and cook, stirring often to crumble, until cooked through. Do not drain.

2. Add the coleslaw mix, bean sprouts, corn, garlic, ginger, and soy sauce to the skillet with the sausage. Cook for 3-4 minutes covered or until cabbage has softened a bit.

3. Remove from the heat and top with the green onions and drizzle with sesame oil.

4. Serve Immediately

*You can use hot sausage if you like spicier foods.

** You can sub 5-6 cups of chopped cabbage instead if you like. I just like to cheat and used the pre-cut kind!

A Letter To My 20 Year Old Self

Hi 20 Year Old Amelia, 

I was sitting in my house yesterday when it hit me how much has changed over the past 5 years. When I was 20, I had so many thoughts about how things would be when I was 25, but I didn't expect it to be half of what it is.

When you are 20, you are still so young and new to the world of adulthood. Five years ago I was working at the camp in the summer and making ends meet throughout the winter months. I lived in Riverfront as I went to school. My roommate at the time was Tanisha and Mindu. I was single and I tried to not let it bother me even though it did.

Its funny how the problems of one time tend to solve themselves as you push through. College was an interesting time in my life. I was out on my own and learning the world slowly on my own terms. I think I was more stressed than I needed to be at the time because I wanted everything to be perfect.

But one thing that I wish I could say to myself is that life just isn't perfect sometimes. Some jobs were not meant to be at certain times but later would become something that you enjoyed and have fond memories of. You WILL be an RA in time, you just have to keep applying. You just weren't quite ready yet (and trust me, being able to celebrate your 21st birthday not as an RA was a blessing in disguise). 

Don't give up on love. I know that at this time, you don't think that there is anyone out there who will love you and want to be with you. You are self conscious of your body and just don't see all the beautiful things there are about you. Don't worry though, the person you find is right in front of you, you just have to ask him. Spoiler alert: once you do, you will go on to marry him in September 2016!

And don't give up on your dreams. You want to have a house and a job and be successful. You will achieve all these things if you do what you always do and put your mind to it. You will get your degree, don't be too hard on yourself right now. You will find that job, just keep applying. Remember to tell yourself that the worst they can say is no, but don't give up. Things have come to you when you needed them and that will continue. You will find that job upon graduation and it will be with a company that you will still be working for 3 years later and one that you see a long term career with. You will find something you love that at the end of the day you feel fulfilled because you made a difference. You will find a company that shares your beliefs and morals.

And don't give up on that little house with the fence and the dog and cat. That was a dream that you held on to for such a long time and you were able to make it a reality before your 26th birthday. You now have a house, with a fence. A dog that you love and a cat that loves you, even if she doesn't always show it. You have a kitchen with the window over the sink, just like your mother always wanted. And a backyard where your dog can run and play (and someday your children will play there too). 

All the things you went through before now and will go through in the next 5 years all led up to this happiness. It may seem so far off, but 5 years is so short. You will lose friends and make friends. You will have some strained relationships that will come back in time. You will have some really painful things come up and you will get through. You will grieve losses but you will have so many more triumphs that will bring smiles and joy. You will make your life be beautiful in its own way and learn from so many lessons along the way. Don't be too hard on yourself. Just be you.

And this is where I leave you. Go out there and do all the amazing things that you have done in the past 5 years. There will be even more excitement to in my next 5, 10, 20, 50 years. Don't be too hard on yourself when everything isn't perfect. You are perfect. You are smart. You are beautiful- it just took you some time to realize it. :)

-25 year old Amelia 

Dear Aunt Anne,

It's 1:22 in the morning and the only person I can think about is you. I had a moment, about 20 minutes ago, as I was going back to bed after letting the dog out where a memory popped in my head. It was a rather good memory, one of you. But it made the tears start flowing and they just wouldn't stop until I got my thoughts down.

When I was younger, I remember you made me some stationary. It stated something along the lines of "from the desk of Amelia Moore" or "With love from Amelia" or something like that. And on the top you had taken that picture of my mother, brother and I from Paula's wedding and just cropped it of me. You made me like 10 sheets but I thought they were made out of gold and I remember I used to write little notes on them to people and when I got down to the last sheet, I saved it forever until I found someone special.

I can't remember who I wrote to back then. Probably family members and friends who have long thrown those letters in the garbage. But I can remember that paper and how today I love my stationary and how I write people all over the world.

The day I found out you had passed was a normal Wednesday. I was sitting at work doing my normal things when Aunt Jane popped up on my phone. She didn't even have to say your name before I knew what she was calling about. And I cried, much like I am now, for the times I missed because of my stupid pride. Missed opportunities that I would never get back.

We both are/were stubborn women and I know that throughout the years, you loved me just the same, even when we had our disagreements. Heck, there are things on this very blog that you both loved to hear and also hated to hear. And I know that. It has always been easier for me to communicate by written word; a fatal flaw of sorts.

I hope you know that I loved you too. I have said many hateful words in the past. I have disagreed with things that happened and were said, but I still love and appreciate everything you did or tried to do for me. Even those things I had no idea about until long after the fact.

And I am sorry that Kevin and I couldn't have gotten married last fall. I will always remember the one comment to me when you said "Why can't you do it this year?" and I said something along the lines that we didn't have the money. You and I both know that I could have thrown everything I had and was given in my 25th year towards a beautiful wedding, but you and I also both know that isn't what my mother would have wanted. We are putting it where it rightfully should go, into a house that is ours for our future.

I guess I will leave this here. It is funny how grief gets you. I cried when I found out you had died and hell, I cried pretty hard when we said goodbye as a family. But then I went back to my life. I tried to show some support to your kids whose shoes I had been in 12 years before, but I went back to everything I had built after the funeral home.

Until February 16th at 1am when your memory reminded me that I won't be able to see you at my wedding this September and that you are no longer with us. Even if I don't show it, I remember. And it still hurts.

I love you Aunt Anne. Just as much as I loved you when you gave me that stationary and as much as I didn't want to admit I did when we had our differences.

Love your niece,

Amelia

I Found THE Dress

Wedding dress shopping should be fun but for many brides, they find that finding that right dress is so hard and it is down right stressful. This is because this one dress holds so much expectation. All your family and friends will see you in it, it is the symbol of your old life joining your new life with your husband. With all those expectations also come opinions.

I believe the #1 reason that a bride doesn't get a dress that she wants is because she thinks that someone will disapprove of it. This past weekend I went shopping with my bridal party and my fiance's mother. She wasn't originally a fan of the fact that I loved the big tulle ball gown shapes and not the more traditional styles. At one point in the appointment, I said to her the reason why I love the tulle- it is my personality. I am a bubbly person and I love to make a splash when I can. I am in no way traditional and she changed her opinion pretty quickly. Though brides shouldn't have to explain themselves, I did because I didn't want it to be something that would come between us during this whole process.

Interestingly enough, I didn't find my dress at this store. I was actually very disappointed in their choices in dresses for women my size and the consultant I had was less than enthusiastic about serving me that day. But I did find another dress.

For months I have been eyeing it on David's Bridal. Everyone told me "do not go to David's Bridal," "I heard horror stories." But this dress was beautiful and just what I wanted. Plus is was on sale for much cheaper than those other dresses I was less than enthused about. Then it went on sale for $100 and I snatched it up. The moment I put it on at home, I knew it was going to be the one and I just can't wait to walk down the aisle in it. While there is some tulle and it is a ballgown, it is still traditional in a sense but it is so me. Even my bridal party said so and said they liked it much better than any designer dress I could have bought for tons more.

Who would have thought that I would wear a wedding dress that was cheaper than my Prom dress! :) I am so excited to get it fitted correctly (using a local seamstress, not the store) and to wear it on my big day!

I'm Gonna Get Married

So, its been a few months since the engagement between Kevin and I actually happened, but I just felt the need to share the story of one of the most surprising and amazing nights of my life.

It was a Thursday night, March 5th, 2015 and I was sitting at home. Kevin and I work at the same place but our shifts are a little off on Thursdays so I end up getting home at around 7 while he gets home after 9. I had already gotten home and changed into my comfy clothes, cooked dinner (it was waiting on the stove) and had settled down in front of Netflix to watch some Grey's Anatomy reruns. Kevin had been fighting a cold for a few days so nothing seemed out of the ordinary to me when he said he was stopping at the store to get some cough drops.

It was around 9:45 when the dog alarm alerted me that Kevin was coming through the door, but he was hiding something. Since from the place I was perched on the couch had full visibility of the door, Kevin told me I had to close my eyes. Confused, I did as I was told, with a dramatic scene of Grey's anatomy playing in the background. He came over and behind me and placed a bouquet of flowers, later to be revealed as roses, in my right hand and kneeled on my left side before having me open my eyes.

"Will you marry me?" He asked as he held up the white ring box with the beautiful ring.

"Are you serious?" I said, not believing him as he had told me previously that he was going to fake me out.

"Yes!" He said, laughing.

"Of course," I said as I started to cry happy tears. I made him put the ring on my hand, which fit perfectly, and we kissed. It really was beautiful. I got up and into the kitchen where the light was on so I could look at the ring better and he said "We need to make it facebook official." (which, if you know anything about our relationship, that was the first thing we did after deciding to start dating. We have pictures of is making it facebook official.) I said that we need to tell a couple people first, so I snapped a picture and sent a few texts to friends and family. Then I put the needed ring picture on instagram and facebook.

I was still crying happy tears when I said, "Well dinner is done..." Kevin laughed. We dished some food out but I was so excited I could barely eat.

While we always think about some grand gesture for our engagement, I truthfully think I wouldn't want it any other way than at home. Kevin said he didn't want to do it at a restaurant because it wouldn't be a surprise and I would be crying all over the place in the middle of the place. I loved that it was at home and private to us. Much more sentimental (and I'll always be able to say that I didn't believe him when he asked me!)

By the way...I never paused Grey's Anatomy once throughout the whole time.

#WipeForWater Is A Great Campaign

In March, I was the lucky recipient of a Voxbox from a wonderful website I have been a member of called influenster. Influenster allows you to connect your social media and use your influence to try new and different products and then review them.

This voxbox I recieved had a full size package of Neutrogena Naturals Make Up Wipes. It also included a small card with the information about the wipe for water challenge. Did you know that we waste up to 5 gallons of water just washing our face? It doesn't seem like a lot, but as a world, we are becoming more conscious of the water that we use and we are trying to preserve our natural resources. Neutrogena is leading the charge when it comes to make up and its removal.

I didn't think these wipes would be that great since they are naturally derived and use very few chemicals but I thought I would give the challenge a try.

Day 1:  I noticed that my skin was clean, soft and refreshed. I actually didn't have any greasy residue after using the wipes and the smell was nice.

Day 2: I really thought that the feeling from the night before wouldn't last until the next day. I tend to get a lot of grease, especially on my forehead, and I didn't think this would last. I was wrong as my skin felt wonderful. I used the wipe again and washed off the days dirt and my skin still felt wonderful.

Day 3: My skin was still beautiful and starting to even glow a bit. I noticed that the dryness from being sick was clearing up as well.

Day 4-present:  I have actually used these every night since and it has become a routine (yes I have had to buy more and had a surprisingly hard time finding them as they were always out of stock- so they must be popular! 

Overall, I am very happy that I was sent this product for testing purposes. It is a wonderful face wipe and the challenge is great. I have taken out most of my face washing routine in place of the wipes and just wash in the shower when needed.

A Bit of an Update

Well...it has been forever since I have been on here. Life has so happened but in a great and wonderful way. I think the last time I had an actually life update on here was almost a year ago. So...here goes!

I'm still working at the same lovely company. I love Diplomat and everything that we stand for. In December I was asked to head a new team in a new department for a new system that we are using to call our patients to get their refills set up. Though it was challenging and new, I have learned and settled into my new role wonderfully. I really love it actually and getting to know even more people in the company is a wonderful thing. It is always nice putting a face with the name and voice that you hear at the end of the phone.

I'm still living in the same place because I love it there. It is one of the more safer areas I have ever lived in, its quiet and we haven't had any major problems. I am happy with my roommate and feel satisfied that I could stay there for another year or few until I am able to move into something a little more permanent.

Kevin moved in just after Christmas. In December, he received his Bachelor's degree in Healthcare Administration from UM-Flint. Seeing him walk across that stage made me so proud. We are both college graduates! A couple weeks after that, he moved in with me full time. Though it has been testing at times, it has grown our relationship even more. He even accepted a position at Diplomat as well in December- it was a big month for him!

Big news for us (though I know you already know!), on 3/5/15 he asked me to marry him and of course I said yes (....after I said "are you serious?" lol). He asked me after getting home from work in our little home. I cried (of course) but they were happy tears. I am so excited to get married to him and spend the rest of our lives together. Though it took us a long time to start dating, we finally made the leap and I could not have been happier for the last 3 years. I feel so lucky.

There's my ring! He has such great taste :) I love it and look at it everyday!

Of course I know you want to know some details but we are still in the early planning. The date we have picked in 9/17/16- so keep it open people! We are looking to have the ceremony and reception in the Lapeer area but that may change, we haven't booked anything yet. So many people have come out of the woodwork to help out so far and offer things as we are doing this on as small as a budget as possible and it has been amazing. I want to thank those who have offered services, ideas and items for our big day!

Other than that, its life as usual. Tonks is a cute little stinker with an attitude. Working like crazy but loving every minute of it.

Life is wonderful...thanks for being a part of it. Here are some pics of the year :)

Edith Eger, a holocaust survivor. She was an amazing woman to meet.

Color run- thanks Sally for joining me!

Wine and brownies with the bestie

The cats loving the warmer weather we had a few weeks ago, watching the birdies.

I'll Make an Influenster Out of You!

Back in late 2012, my friend Luna introduced me to a great website...Influenster. I remember her texting me and telling me all about this website where I could earn boxes with free items to test out and how she had gotten her first box. I thought, hey...it's worth a try right?

So she invited me (it is an invite only website) and I joined. I started doing surveys on there about things I liked, wrote reviews for things I used and wracked up some points. 

When I got my first email a month later, I was ecstatic. I was told that I would be testing out a new dish soap. Now dishes weren't my thing but I figured I would receive anything but small sample sized bottles of the product.

BOY was I wrong. In a box I received three full sized products of Palmolive Fresh Infusions (see my blog post about it here). I gave one to my boss at the time to give a try and I tested them out. They smelt amazing and were kind to my hands. I was so happy to try something like this out.

And the boxes (called voxboxes) came rolling in. The next one I received a bunch of different items, including the entire Colgate Optic White line, a new spray on lotion from Vaseline (which became one of my favorite lotions, Dickinson's Face wipes (which I also came to love) and some other goodies. 

I also received voucher programs for products that can't be shipped. One was for a wonderful yougurt drink and frozen yogurt and the other was for Sargento cheese.

But this website isn't just for the free items that you receive. I found myself a community of people with opinions. I'm not going to lie, half the time when I am trying to find a new product or see if something I am thinking about buying for the first time is worthwhile, I take a little trip over to influenster to see what kinds of thoughts others have had.

And I get to share my thoughts. Have you ever found a shampoo, makeup, household item, etc that you just can't live without? You can share your full thoughts on it for others to view. You can ask questions and get feedback on products. You can learn about other products. This website is literally for everyone. There are outdoor products, mom products, mens products, etc.

So...if you want to take on the challenge of being an influenster. If you are willing to share your opinion with others...let me know. I'll send you an invite!

Check out their website here for more information.

See below for products I have tried and won!

This was my latest voxbox, all these products were wonderful!

This came last Christmas, what a wonderful gift!

Each voxbox has "tasks" that you complete. IF you complete them and you are seen as one of the best, you can win prizes. I won this entire box of makeup as a prize for my Rimmel London Mascara box!

They couldn't send the cheese but they did send me a free lunchbox!

This was my 2nd box Such wonderful products (and the Optic White does work!)

This is my first college box. These products are perfect for any sorority girl!

What Lengths Women Go For Their Hair

So about a month ago, I moved into a new apartment. I was in love with this apartment and was over the moon to finally be living there. 

But everything wasn't perfect. My hair. Now this may sound shallow to some and not like me, but it bothered me. When I lived in my old home, I only had to wash my hair twice a week and it would stay beautiful, soft and flowy. I loved it.

My new problem started very soon after I moved. My hair wouldn't stay as clean as long. I took it as the weather getting warm and I was sweating more. No big deal, I'll wash it more. Then it would get to the point where I would wash it at night and wake up to it being gross, greasy and hard to pull a brush through. It was flat and just not beautiful. 

So I tried a new shampoo. I grabbed one of those shampoos without the sulfates and such that are left behind. It worked for about 1 week. Soon my hair was feeling greasy while it was still wet. I would blow it dry and it would be gross.

This is where Google came in. I trolled online forums for people who had the same problem. And most of the solutions that were found came right from your cup boards at home.

So I thought, why not? I'll give it a try. In came my saviors:

- Original Listerine

- Apple Cider Vinegar

- Witch Hazel

- Baking Soda

- Garnier Fructis Tea Tree Oil Shampoo

- A deep conditioner

1. I started with the vinegar and witch hazel. I used 1/3 cup of vinegar, about 2 tablespoon of witch hazel and enough water for 1 cup of solution.

I poured this over my DRY hair and left it on for 20 minutes while I went around doing things around the house. Rub thus into your scalp before letting it sit!

Now you will smell like a pickle but do t worry, this smell won't last. After about 20 minutes, jump in the shower and rinse it all the way out. You may notice a change in your hair texture already. Mine felt dry- don't worry, the deep conditioner will help this.

2. Next I used my old shampoo for this step. Don't worry about this at all. Pour the amount of shampoo you use for your hair in your hand and put some dry baking soda in it. Mix in your hand to make a paste and apply to your hair- mainly into your scalp and massage on. Really get in there! Then rinse.

3. Next came the Listerine. I poured a capful through my hair from scalp down. This will feel cold and tingly. It felt good to me but for some it may be too much. I rubbed this into my scalp and let it sit for a minute then rinsed.

4. After that, I used the tea tree shampoo to cleanse my hair and some of the dry feeling went away. Rinse.

5. Lastly I used a deep conditioner in my hair. The kind I used was Herbal Essence Hydraliscious. I applied liberally and let sit on my hair for a few. Use more at the ends but don't forget to give you roots a little love too. Rinse well.

I found my hair texture had approved tenfold with this and when I blow dried it after the shower, my hair was silky and smooth- much like it used to feel! 

Thoughts

Today, I  am having just one of those days. One of those days when you realize just how lucky you really are and you take the time to count your blessings.

Last Saturday, one of the call center workers at my work collapsed while walking back in from break and was gone before he made it to the hospital. He was 32 years old.  Tuesday morning after the long weekend, the building had this eerie feel about it, a quiet. The only kind of quiet that a loss like that could give.

One of the girls who was on the Synagis team was a close personal friend of his and I can't imagine what she has been going through.

But its times like these that makes me realize how lucky I am for everything I have in my life. Recently, I was able to move to a new townhouse in a much better area. Not only do I feel safer (and willing to take my dog for a walk), I no longer have to worry about the upkeep as much as I did at the house I was renting. Now, I'll miss that house. It was a cool place and had a great layout. But the stress that came with it (and the crazy water bills) are not something that I will miss. 

Right before moving, I was promoted to a higher position. Though it has been a time of great change as it is my 3rd department in the year that I have been with the company, I have learned a lot and I am welcoming this new position with open arms. I love my new team and the fellow leads who I work with. Everyone has been so inviting and patient with me as I learn the ropes.

And I have amazing people in my life. Not only do I have great friends who make me smile all the time, I have the best boyfriend in the world. He makes me feel like a queen and helps me feel beautiful when I'm not so sure. Though we have our moments (what couples don't), I know that someday, I'm going to marry that boy...and for that I cannot wait.

Life is so exciting when you get the chance to experience it. I feel so lucky to be continually growing and being. Though there are people in my life that I miss all the time, I know that I will see them someday and it will be wonderful. I have the best group of guardian angels up there watching out for me and helping me get through the tough stuff. Sometimes with a bunch of determination (and a few tears) you are able to get through those hard moments.

It doesn't rain forever, you just have to wait for the sun to come back.

Here's some pictures from the past few weeks:

Goals- Again

So, my cousin asked me for the link to this blog, which was all cool, and I remember that I even had this blog and haven't actually posted on here in awhile. I was looking at some of my old posts and realized that my goals post that I made- I have completed these goals. Well, 4 out of the 5 of them. The other one, I have just been so busy that I keep forgetting to look into Alumni relations....oops.

In September, I completed my first 5K and I want to do another...and another. In October, I did the month of giving. Though I didn't share what happened, I did a lot of good deeds for some very deserving people. In December, I got my CPhT which is totally awesome. And this past week, I finally got the promotion I was working on and start it in a couple weeks. I am very excited about what life has in store for me.

But with that realization, I remembered that I need new goals. This time, I think I'm going to make them a little harder to achieve.

1. Complete the National Diabetes Prevention Program

This is one that I decided a couple weeks ago that I was going to do. Through Diplomat, they are offering this program for $100. It is a yearlong program where we attend classes that teach us about different healthy habits (many of those that I don't have), help give us the ability to knock down barriers against us being able to be healthier and help us lose 5-7% of our body weight over the year, which isn't a lot- but it is proven that can lessen your chance for developing diabetes by 64%. That is huge! I know that I have gained a lot of weight in the past, so I think it is time to lose it again.

Click here to learn more about the program.

2. Learn!

I will be starting a new position soon and I am excited to learn a lot. I plan to learn more about who I am as a person, where do I fit into the scheme of things and start making those long term goals. When I left high school, I wanted to be a music teacher. When I left college, I left with a bachelor's degree and no idea where I wanted to go with it. Over the next few months, I want to see what I want to do with my future. I want to go back to school for a masters, but what for? Where do I want to go from here? What are my career goals? I am in a time of learning a lot about who I am, and what kind of worker I am. It's time to decide what I need to achieve where I want to go.

3. Create and Conquer a Summer Bucket List

My friend Abijah has one of these and I think it is something that I should do. Though I haven't sat down and decided what I want to do this summer, I am going to make some plans. Now that I am moving somewhere that takes less time and energy to care for, and I will have a roommate and a higher paying job to help take the stress off of me financially (and finally start some savings), I want to work on a list of fun things for me to do to get involved in my community around me and enjoy life a little more. More on that later.

The Last Conversation I Had With My Father

It was a cold December day in 2004 when I lost my mother. New Year's Eve to be exact. I had been out shopping with my Aunt Debbie when she got the call that my mother had died. She waited until we got home to tell me, before we went inside, that my mother was gone.

3 days later, on cold January 3rd, we buried my mother next to her parents in a funeral that I only remember some of as I was still in shock.

The last time I spoke with my father was 11 months later. One night in November 2005, I was downstairs playing video games with my cousin Mary. Uncle Dave yelled down the stairs that my father was on the phone and to grab the cordless down there.

A lot of emotion came up. Why hadn't he called before? Why didn't he contact us when our mother had died? Was he even aware before today that mom had died? I felt angry and disappointed in the person that I called my father.

And the conversation was just as awkward. 

"Hey Amelia..." He said. "How are you?"

"I'm good."

"How have things been?"

"They've been good, just going to school. I'm in the band at school and I love it."

"That's great."

"How have you been?"

"Oh,  I'm good. How's the weather up there?"

"Cold and snowy just like a normal Michigan winter."

"Ah, I miss it up there sometimes."

*long pause*

"Well I'm gonna let you go. I just wanted to check in on you."

"Thanks for calling."

"Love you, bye."

*click*

Little did I know that that 10 minute conversation would be the last time I would hear his voice other than in my head when I thought about him. Four years later, in March is 2009, he would pass away from a mixture of diseases that included cancer and organ failure. I would later learn of his passing in March of 2011 and realize that both my parents were gone.

Though my father never was around much, I still mourn the losses of what could have been. My father was a smart man and I'm sure he would have been proud, as my mother would have been, to see me graduate with a college degree in my hands. I'll never have a father walk me down the aisle and I'll never have a father/daughter dance at my wedding.

Sometimes we take for granted the things we have. Sometimes we don't realize the pain that our fellow man is going through. Sometimes we feel emotions towards another that we do not mean because we don't know the whole story at the time.

I thought of my father as a bad man for many years. I was angry and didn't understand what happened on the day in 1994 when he basically sent himself to prison for many years. I was 4 at the time and never really remembered who my father was before that happened. The times I saw him after were always so awkward, mostly because I didn't know how to act in the situation. 

I have come to learn that my father was a lovely man. Smart, funny, a joy to be around. He was also a man who lost likely fell into a deep depression after losing his job and never got the help he needed.

But my father was my father. Without him I wouldn't be here. I'm just so sorry that I didn't get to know him better before his death. 

Month of Giving Deux

So last year, I read a blog where a woman performed the number of random acts of kindness for the number of years she was alive on her birthday. Taking that thought into mind, I decided that October- my birth month- was a time to give back to fellow man. With that, last year during the month of October, I performed 22 random acts of kindness for people. Some of them included listening to a friend, giving free food to the fellow college kids on my floor and donated to a local children's hospital. A lot of the things were little things but they didn't need to be anything big- they brightened the day of a friend.

So this year, I decided to do it again. In 2 weeks time, I will be 23 years old. So this means that this year I will be performing 23 random acts of kindness over the month of October!

And I invited you to join me! It's not too hard! You don't have to do 23 of course, but just do something nice for you fellow man over the next month.

And feel free to tell me about it! Find a post on my blog and write me a little note telling me what you did. I may even write about you in a post on here!

I am very excited for my birth month and all the kindness coming to people!

More to come...

My First 5K: An Colorful Experience

So this past Saturday, I finished a goal I had set myself out to do. I finished my first 5K. Color Vibe hosted a color run in my city of Flint and I was stoked getting ready for the race. Actually paying $40 to participate made me more motivated to get ready for the race...and my dog loved it. We took some walks around the neighborhood in the month leading up to the race and I spent some time at work also preparing.

About to begin

But nothing really prepares you for the day with all the excitement and people. After waiting through a major traffic jam outside the Everett E. Cummings Center, I parked my car and joined the estimated 2,100 people by the DJ booth. There were people in tutu's, there were people with crazy outfits, there were people EVERYWHERE. But more importantly, there was much more excitement.

I joined the group of people I said I would meet, including Nick and Katie and their two sons. They were walking in honor of a friend's child who had lost her life earlier this year. It was inspiring seeing them out showing support. Before the race even started, we were tossing color in the air. Pink...for Meagan.

After we finished!

As the race started, we were herded (literally) towards the rows of flags that showed the beginning of the race. The race was let off in heats, with about 100 people starting every 5 minutes. We were near the back so we did a lot of waiting while the DJ played some tunes and got us pepped up. When it was our turn to get to the start area, workers threw bags upon bags of color at us that we threw all over everyone. The DJ counted us off and we were a go. There was a guy with a leafblower blowing color on everyone who passed the start line. It was crazy.

Once out, we all set our pace. The rest of the group were well ahead of me so I threw in my headphones and started jamming. About 1/4 mile in was the first color station. Here workers had one specific color, in this case pink, that they threw on you. After I passed the station, my calves were not having this. I was thinking that this "race" was going to one long race if it hurt all the way. I was making it through though, I was DETERMINED to finish without shortcuts (Which there were them).

About a mile in, Daft Punks "Harder Better Faster" came on and I was like, "THIS IS MY JAM." It was about this point that the endorphins FINALLY did their trick and my pace picked up again. The second color station- blue- they were out of color which made me kind of sad. I just kept going. At the 2/3 mark was the green station where the volunteers were all cheering and telling everyone to roll on the ground. Some people did, I just wasn't doing it this early in the morning. ;)

Me before the dance party

After the water station provided by the charity for the event, United Way of Genessee County, Nick, Katie and the kids were waiting for me. It was super awesome of them to stop for me! We watched Connar kneel in the purple station and finished the race together.

A color throw at the end

But the color awesomeness was not over yet! At the end they were having a dance party with the DJ. Every 10 minutes or so they threw out about 100 bags of color and went around with boxes of color for people to take handfuls and throw in the air. And it was awesome looking. In that last dance party, I got a ton more color on me and had a blast. Some random girl loved all the color on me and asked me to pose for a picture with her. Why not?

Me after the racce

Trust me, somehow I ended up not making a HUGE mess of my car, just a little one. Thank God for trash bags. I went home where Tonks freaked out because I was covered in stuff she didn't know. I had one rainbow shower and had an enjoyable and relaxing rest of my day! I think I am down to do another 5K sometime soonish!

New Goals

So, I realized the other day that a lot of my goals that I had made in the past are well...complete. Which, that's pretty awesome to say because that means I have accomplished a lot.

So, it's time to reassess my goals that I have made and make some new goals.

1. Complete a 5 K

This means I need to get to walking. As of tomorrow, I plan to sign up for my first 5 K, the Color Vibe. It is in Flint on September 21. If things go well, I would like to also sign up for the Color Me Rad 5K in October. Today I made the pact with myself to start walking. I hooked Tonks up to a leash and we started with a mile. I may had to carry her some because she was being stubborn but she got the feel for the leash eventually (and was enjoying the attention). I have mapped out several different routes in my neighborhood that will get me up to my goal.

2. Get my CPhT

Diplomat is awesome that they provide training, paid study hours and lots of refreshers on everything I'll need to take this test....and then pays for the test! Since Kevin will be going back to school in September, I will miss campus. So I decided this fall is time for me to get back to the books myself. My goal is to have taken my test (and passed) by November.

3. Get more involved in the Alumni Association

I emailed the head of the UM-Flint Alumni Association to show my interest and I plan on finding times to volunteer and attend events with the alumni association. I spent 5 years at UM-Flint and it'll be cool to help give other students a great time as well. Plus, there are some perks of being an alumni that I plan to cash in on.

4. Do Another "A Month of Giving."

Last year, it was SO much fun. This year is unlucky number 23. I have a new group of people to share my generosity with and I invite you to join me :)

5. Get a Promotion

This one may actually come with number 2. After getting my CPhT, I will be able to internally apply for many positions in Diplomat, and as a college grad, I am qualified for even more positions than my coworkers. This will take some work and determination, but I am ready!

Amelia's Super Amazing Easiest Peanut Butter Cheesecake You'll Ever Make

So, I have been known for this cheesecake over the years. For some people, "it has a special place in their heart." And I don't mind making it because it is the easiest thing you'll ever make! It also tastes like a Reese's Peanut Butter Cup. Don't trust me, make it yourself!

Easiest Peanut Butter Cheesecake Ever!

Ingredients
1 cup creamy peanut butter (choose your brand)
1 8oz package cream cheese (softened)
1 8oz tub of Cool Whip (defrosted)
3/4 cup sugar
1 bottle of chocolate ice cream shell
1 Oreo Crust

Directions
1. Place peanut butter, cream cheese and sugar in a bowl/blender (I am using a blender in this case because a piece of my mixer is missing)

2. Blend until well mixed.

3 Add 1/2 the tub of Cool whip and blend until mixed.

4. Pour mixture into oreo shell and smooth. Cover with thin layer of chocolate ice cream shell.

5. Place in the refrigerator for about 10 minutes (a great time to clean up your mess!) or until shell has thickened. Cover the top with the other half of Cool Whip until it covers the filling. Decorate the top of the Cool Whip with chocolate shell if you life.

6. Cool in refrigerator for several hours. If you are taking it to a party, freeze it over night so that by the time people are ready to dig it, it has thawed!

Substitutions!

If you are looking for a less sugary cake, substitute Cool Whip for sugar free (it's just as good), use a peanut butter with less sugar added and use an artificial sweetener (you would know better than me how much of your favored sweetener equals 3/4 cup of sugar). You can even substitute the chocolate shell with chocolate syurp (which I did for several years and it comes in sugar free as well!).

A Rant About Emotions

So, it's been a long time since I had an actual rant on here. I mean, this blog IS called "Rants of an Optimist." I felt like today was a perfect day for a rant about something that seems to mess with people quite often. Our emotions.

For one, I am generally a happy person. Since I was a child, I always had this smile plastered on my face. I was always complimented on how beautiful my smile is. But, I think what most people miss is that fact that I have more than one emotion. Though I don't show it very often, I feel the gamut of emotions quite often. But I think it is the way I deal with the negative ones for the most part that allows me to move on to the positive ones.

A smile is a mask. Many times, it is a mask that I hide behind. Why? Well, for one, people tend to act towards you much better if you are smiling or in a positive mood. They are more likely to work with you on whatever you are going to them with and get it done without hard feelings. This is because positivity makes you a good person to be around.

But hiding hiding behind a smile is NOT healthy for you. If you push those emotions inside and don't let yourself feel them at some point, they will bottle up for a long time. It is a proven fact that those who bottle emotions physically get sick more often, have higher blood pressure, better chance of heart attack and stroke and can end up blowing up at the wrong time. Blow ups can lead to loss of friendships or ties with family members. It is truly very sad.

And something that I have experienced first hand. There was a lot of things that I allowed to bottle up for a very long time and I finally blew up on a March morning. Now there are family ties I am sure I will never regain, and members of my family who won't even say hello to me when we are in the same vicinity.

I have learned that bottling up emotions is not a good thing at all. After my mother's death, I hid a lot of pain and resentment inside myself.  Though I went through counseling in high school, it never really helped much because I wasn't comfortable with the woman who I went to see. I told her what she wanted to hear. I told her what was expected. It all went down to the one time I said something I truly meant and the woman said that "I think you are lying." I acted out in the wrong ways for the attention that I craved.

So when I got to college, I hit a dark place in my life. Those first couple years of college were some of my most tumultuous and painful. They were lonely. I remember spending hours lying on the floor just being sad. I remember sitting in the dark because I didn't want to turn on the light.

But I came out of that dark place thanks to the help of some great friends in my life. Through their hugs and them lending me their time and ears, I have developed ways to cope and move on from those bouts of darkness. I learned from those months of happiness in between the darkness that I was bottling up every negative emotion I felt because I was afraid that feeling it would lead me back to the dark place...and eventually it had.

So, what I really learned. If there is anything that you can learn from this post, it is this: let yourself feel the emotions. If you are sad. Cry. Be sad. But let it happen because it will pass. If you are angry, find a way that won't hurt you or someone/thing else and let it out. May it be talking to a good friend or lover. Or screaming into a pillow. Or playing a musical instrument. Do it. And let the anger pass.

I know for a fact that humans don't like feeling negative emotions. But if you let yourself feel them, they will pass. I think that we all need to remember the phrase "This too shall pass." Because it will, everything does.

And if you find yourself is a dark part of your life, know that I am always here for you. Even if we have never met. I am always willing to listen to you and let you get past this part in your life.

And if you are presented with a friend who is sad and angry, don't pass them off. If they are coming to you, it means that they trust and love you. It means that you are their person and they want to come to you with all the issues that they are dealing with. Most of the time, they just need someone to listen to them for a little while so they can figure out how to move on. You can be that person for someone.

And that is more of a gift than you could ever imagine.

/rant

New Additions to My Family and Beyond!!!

So, I am in love....with my dog AND my new niece!!!!

First off, on July 16, 2013, my niece, Arabella Leigh Moore was born to my brother and his wife Jessica. I am so excited to be Auntie Amelia. I haven't been able to get up there to meet the little girl, but I am hoping to be able to work something out in the next couple of weeks!!

Arabella Leigh Moore
6lbs 14 oz, 16.5inches
Birthdate: 07/13/2013

And then... on the 4th of July weekend, I got the message I was waiting so long for. My puppy that I had reserved in the beginning of June was ready for me to take home. I was overjoyed.

After a mis-communication, I met the past owner and picked up my little snuggly bundle of joy. At just 6 weeks old, I would like to introduce you to the cute little ball of fur with a big name. Her official name is Nymphadora Tonks, but I just call her Tonks for short. Now many, who haven't gotten into the Harry Potter series, don't like the name. But I think it is cute and fitting. She is such a little ball of craziness, much like the character in the book was!

This was Tonks the afternoon I got her on 7/5/13

Over the past few weeks I have gotten to know and love this little pup very much. This much is for certain, I am most definelty her human. Last night I was lying in bed with her next to me and Boe (who was originally named Sassy) lying on my chest and realized that these are -my- animals. I have waited so long to have animals that I can call my own. Here are some other photos from her recent adventures.

I decided to stick my sunglasses on her. This was on our way to go camping with Kevin's family on 7/12.

On the way home from camping 7/14. She was one tired puppy :)

This was last night 7/24. She was sleepy after a visit from Marita!

Life is just really good. I can't complain one bit!

New Additions and Life :)

Life is so interesting to me, and taking a look back on what I have done and what is to come still in my life...it is exciting! Things have been well lately, I know I haven't been in the blogosphere in awhile. I am getting fully settled into my new home now and have happily added 2 additions to my family.

This little cutie came first. Kevin text me one day when I was at work with her picture. He said he had found her at a garage sale, she was free, had her first shots and was spayed. I couldn't say no. It took her a bit to warm up, the poor thing had been taken home and the father said no...so they had to give her away. After moving to several homes over a couple days' time, she came to my house and has fully taken it over as her own. She is a sweet kitty that likes to cuddle, but has quite the sassy attitude, which is why I named her Sassy.

And this kitty was originally Molly's. Not that she didn't love her very much, but Molly had gotten Berry from an old roommate basically, and just ended up keeping her. We decided, once I moved out of the dorms and into a home where I could have cats again, she was all mine. So, we planned that. Then late one Saturday, Molly text me and said she could bring the cat that night. Around 2 am in the morning, Berry (Little Kitty) arrived at home home and found  her place in the basement. It took some time for her to even feel comfortable coming out of hiding other than when I was downstairs, and Sassy was pretty pissy with her for about 5 days. But now they are pretty good friends. They play with each other and have slept close to each other. Everyday they seem to be becoming more and more accustomed to each other and enjoying the other's presence...so I have hope.

One other memeber of my family will be coming in a couple weeks. I am getting a puppy! I have reserved a pure bred Beagle from a guy in Vassar. I am very excited to get her when she is finally old enough :)

Other than that, I have just been working. I am actually enjoying my position at Diplomat, and am now in a place to start preparing for my Certified Pharmacist Technician license test that I plan on taking in late fall/winter time. I would like to have it around my 6 month mark at the company, because that is the time that I am eligible for promotion, and well...I want to move up from here. The  sky is the limit.

I have also started to look at graduate programs. I am hoping to possibly start one in fall of 2014 or Winter of 2015. I just need to find my right fit.

Right now, I just look at how lucky I am at the moment with  everything in my life. I recently got to spend time with my brother and celebrate the upcoming birth of his daughter, Aribella. I am so excited for her to be here. July 12th is the due date, but she really could  come any day now. Jessica's birthday is the 3rd of July and she stated that if she wanted to come that day, she would share her day :). Another July baby, what a popular month for our family!

I'll leave you here today. I've been writing this between calls at work as I'm on incoming calls and have nothing to do between calls. I hope you all have a wonderful hump day and I'm sure I won't be talking to you until after the 4th holiday, so have a great 4th...and see some fireworks!

Moving On Campus: What To Bring/What Not To Bring

Every fall, thousands of students move on campus. For some of these students, they have never lived away from home before. For these students, what should they bring and what should be left at home.

Bring

1. Clothing: bring enough clothes to make it through. If you aren't moving too far from home, only bring clothes that will bring you through a season. You can always switch out when winter comes. There is little room in a dorm, so the least amount of clothing (and shoes) you can live without, the better.
2. Hangers: You'll need hangers to hang up all those clothes!
3. Bedding: Most dorm beds are Twin XL, which means that a twin sheet just isn't long enough. Make sure you bring bedding that will fit, pillows, blankets, etc. as they won't be provided for you.
4. Bathroom Items: This means towels, wash cloths, soap, toilet paper, shampoo/conditioner, brush/combs, deodorant, lotions, perfumes, make-up, shaving cream, razors, bathrobe, first aid kit etc. Most of these things are NOT provided (except some campuses will provide toilet paper). 
5. If you have communal showers, you'll want a bathroom bucket. This holds all your bathroom items so you can carry them down the hall to the bathroom. 
6. Cleaning Items: Bring a broom, sponge, dish soap, cleaning sprays for bathroom/kitchen, plunger, toilet brush/cleaner, vacuum (if possible). YOU will have to keep your room clean, and you'll need the supplies to do it!
7. TV: Most dorms have cable of some sort. Make sure you bring your own co-ax cable too!
8. Microwave: Make sure you don't already have one (the dorms I live in do!) but if they don't you'll want this kitchen staple!
9. Mini-Fridge: Also, if your dorm doesn't have a fridge, you may want to bring one of these along.
10. Laptop/computer: You'll want this for school work, trust me!
11. Small set of dishes: You won't need too many as most students have a meal plan, but you'll want something to make some coffee in, or some late night Ramen. Make sure you have plates, cups, and all utensils (spoons, forks, knives). You'll also want to throw in a can opener!
12. Alarm clock: You are going to need to get up for classes, make sure you have a working alarm clock thrown in.
13. Hair dryer: You know what this is for!
14. Fan: If you live in a dorm that doesn't have AC, or you tend to get warm, throw in a fan for your comfort.
15. Laundry Items: This includes laundry soap, dryer sheets, hamper/basket and a roll of quarters. Laundry isn't free and those quarters will become your best friend.
16. School stuff: notebooks, binders, pens, pencils, calculator, backpack, planner, books, etc.
17. Camera: You'll want to document you time away from home.
18. Chargers: make sure you can charge your phone, ipod, computer, etc. Also, have some batteries on hand.
19. Games/sporting equipment: Have fun board games? Bring them. Like to throw around a ball? Bring it. You'll find other people on campus who will join you.
20. Snacks/food: The cafeteria isn't open all day and night, so it's good to have some back up food and snacks on hand if you get hungry. If you live in a dorm without a meal plan, you'll need to plan meals more.
21. Lanyard: Trust me, you'll want one of these. This can hold your room key, ID card and other important keys to get you where you need to go. They will always be around your neck so you won't forget them places!
22. Coffee Machine: If you need caffeine in the morning, make sure you have this with the coffee.
23. Small chair: Something like a butterfly chair that can fit in a corner. Can also be a beanbag.
24. Gaming systems: If you have them and don't worry about them, bring them. You'll find other gamers to join you.
25. Matress padding: You may want to invest in a memory foam pad for your bed, the mattresses aren't the most comfortable

What not to bring

1. Furntiure except mentioned above: Most dorms are fully furnished. That means they have a bed, desk, closet/dresser, etc. Call ahead to see what the dorm has/does not have
2. Candles: No live flame in dorms. This can cause fires which can be bad news bears! Also, no incense!
3. Toasters, hot plates, toaster oven, etc: These have open heat elements that can also cause fires.
4. Pets: Sorry, but you can't bring them along :( Some dorms allow fish though!
5. Waterbeds: Yeah, you're gonna have to deal with the dorm beds, and these can cause a flood.
6. Nails/screws for portraits: Command Strips will be your best friend when hanging photos
7. Alcohol: Most dorms are dry, leave it at home.
8. AC Units: Sorry if your dorm doesn't have them, but you can't bring them either.
9. Weapons: All campuses are gun free, so keep it that way.
10. Heaters: These can cause a fire too!